Galaxy against Red Bulls is the only game for me

Managers claim the fixture computer is taking the micky out of them when they get handed a long-haul away trip on Boxing Day. I reckon it's taking the micky out of me this weekend.

Saturday, when everyone's busy, everything's going on and there's barely time to sit down, we get the Merseyside derby and the north London derby thrown at us.

Then, a nice quiet Sunday with hours of afternoon viewing ahead of us we get West Brom v Burnley. If there's more than a goal in this one I'll fall off my chair.

Okay, a lot of people will be glued to the Ryder Cup all afternoon, but I can't get excited about it. It's just one bloke with funny trousers and a visor against another. You can tell me I should be supporting 'our boys', but golf's not a team game and I just can't raise a cheer.

Wembley's gone all American this evening but I won't be watching that either. Long trousers, helmets and cheerleaders - it's just not what the home of football is about.

The Sunday afternoon European TV fare brings us the Hamburgers against the Frankfurters, a fixture that's just going to have me thinking about food so I won't be able to concentrate.

Luckily I've got a four-star nap to keep me interested all day - LA Galaxy -1 on the Asian handicap against New York Red Bulls.

LA can't stop scoring, New York haven't found the net in their last two away matches, and this should be a stroll.

The only problem is it doesn't kick off until 1.30 in the morning. I'm going to need an afternoon nap to keep me going. And a 4pm kick-off at the Hawthorns looks the perfect time to have it.